Sisterhood: Carmen

I leave Carmen Chan Mei-yuk to the last in my series called Sisterhood not because she is the less important one among the five or the least active in my school life but because I have a lot to say about her.

We met in F1A and she sat beside me. In primary school, students sat side by side on a bench seat separated by an iron rail. The desk was one long table and students sitting together more or less had to accommodate each other and there could never be any big movements. But as soon as we got into the secondary section, desk and chair were arranged in single row so we sat near or next to each other but separated and independent.

Carmen and I both sat at the back of the class with two tall boys sitting behind us. They were David Lui Siu-hing and Tsang Yan-hoi. Both were tall and handsome boys and although we were nowhere near as smitten as a girl who sat on row 3 and column 3 and whose first name was Lo, we were mighty proud to have two hunks behind us. Our classmate Lo was always turning her head to look at Tsang at all times, I thought she might develop a pain in the neck at the end of the day. Evelyn, Carmen and I even had a poem written about the whole thing. The first verse begins with ‘Three three is where XX Lo sits’. The rest is now forgotten. This tells you how naughty we were. Immediately in front of us sat Vincent Lam Shu-sum and Alex Yu Wai-yin and flanked on both sides sat Richard Hui Wan-fai and another nerdy looking boy whose name I have yet to remember. The class atmosphere and spirits were high as I imagine us having attained secondary school status all felt a bit intoxicated by being treated as more grown-ups than babies.

Carmen came from a rather ‘huge’ family. She lived in Sai Yeung Choi Street in Mongkok. I can’t remember exactly how many flights of stairs she had to climb every day, but for certain she lived at least 7-story high and there was no lift facility there. Her elder sister, the one preceded her and her younger sister, the one immediately after her were both attending Munsang College at the time and the group went to school together. Carmen told me the three sisters went shopping together and did almost everything as a group. How I longed to have a sister! All my girlfriends seemed to be blessed with ready-made companions and I was left with two elder brothers who loved soccer more than anything else.

For the first three years of secondary school, Carmen and I were in the same class. With Petula Lai, Cindy Lo and Irene Cheung as newcomers in F2A, the group of girls was merrier than ever. We had a new teacher too. Ms Ma Ka-wing came to teach us History/English in a light blue cheongsam. The traditional Chinese dress really did not suit her, as she was too young for that. I remember her porcelain face with dark rim glasses and her impeccable manners and speech. Her diction was music to my ears and I fell for her instantly. There was another teacher who either taught us Geography or English and she was rather religious. Spreading Christianity seemed to be uppermost on her mind and I was once her target. Having finished my composition early, I sat and rested but the religious fanatic seized the chance to give me a lesson on the gospels. I was annoyed but listened patiently. When I turned down her invitation to a Christian fellowship meeting after school, she showed her displeasure. I remember telling Carmen about the incident and she was on my side. Because of that, I was amazed at finding Carmen not only a Christian but also a fervent one as well when I returned from Canada in 1980.

In F3A we had a new teacher Mr Chang from the Chinese University teaching us English. Having just graduated from university and having us as his first batch of students, he was most enthusiastic in his first job. I guess those in that class would remember his many picnics to various places. He even took us to climb the Lion Rock Mountain. Carmen and I would team up in getting food and drinks. Pretending to be grown ups, we used to bring beer along to our outings. Thank goodness we had no drinking law for the under aged. Another thing was, there were no weirdoes or pedophiles around for parents to worry about. So when most students only had one picnic per school year, we had several. The exact number is beyond my memory now. The time after the picnic was equally great. We would play soccer in the field and Mr Chang would buy us pops afterwards. Under his guidance, my English improved leaps and bounds. My writing was considered mediocre before but Mr Chang was finding every piece I wrote better than the last and I received unprecedented high marks. Thinking back, I don’t see Mr Chang as having very good English, at least not as good as Ms Ma. Yet he was able to incite the imagination and hard work from his students and he was able to be a positive force in their growth. This is the true gift of a teacher. I heard he was in Toronto with wife and children and that he was doing well.

Mr Chang, the Chemistry teacher and Mr Law, the Mathematics teacher, teamed up to organize a Photography Club for the students who had better results than others. They said the ‘nerds’ or those who studied too hard but with few hobbies could use some outside attractions other than books. Not every gifted student consented to joining so these teachers had no alternative but to offer memberships to the second batch of gifted students that included Carmen and I.

Mr Chang was nicknamed Frankenstein. He was a teacher from the old school and he firmly believed if he were not strict, his students would not be outstanding. His Chemistry test/exams were difficult to pass. I remember his famous laugh when he found his students baffle-looking after tackling the exam paper in the hall.

Mr Law was not called Yim Law Wong (Emperor from Hell) for nothing. He was always dressed in white short-sleeved shirt (like the Hawaiian shirt) over his gray pants, somewhat like what people wore in Communist China at the time. He never even smiled when greeted by his students. There was hardly any rapport between him and anybody else. He walked slowly, almost gliding along. The lesson was delivered and off he went. Don’t take me wrong, I think he cared about his students but teachers in those days just had to act tough and hard to reach.

The first meeting of the Photography Club was to help clean the Chemistry laboratory. We cleaned every single inch of the lab, all the flasks and test tubes and the floors. We worked for hours on that Saturday. While some members might have felt honored to be selected, Carmen and I felt cheated. There were a couple of things Mr Chang and Mr Law did not like about us. Carmen and I both had a single lens reflect camera, which was in contrast with the box camera from China the teachers wanted us to get. They kept saying their choice was better but of course they could not have asked us to buy another one. Another thing was they could not have been happy with our giggles and cheerfulness. After all, extracurricular activity, to them, was solemn business.

In one outing to Hong Kong Island, we were supposed to be meeting outside of the Tsim Sha Tsui Ferry Pier early Saturday morning. I was late and was just in time to get on the ferry. On getting off the ferry on the other side, I saw in my horror teachers and students getting out from the lower deck. Knowing how frugal the teachers were with money, I was hiding on the top of the stairs because I got on the upper-deck, the more expensive section.

Anyway, throughout our club days, Carmen and I hung out together and pretty much ignored the nerdy boys. Raymond Chau said he was a member but I hardly remember him. I did not have any memorable picture shot or developed in those days but I did take some good pictures of Evelyn Chang and Irene Cheung with my camera skill. Years later when came time for Carmen to leave Hong Kong for the States, we went and each bought the same camera.

Carmen and I were weak in Physics so in F5 we shared the cost of hiring a teacher to tutor us in preparation for the school cert. Carmen and the teacher came to my flat on Saturday morning for the tutorial. She was a teacher teaching in DGS but she failed to help us get a passing grade.

During our post school cert days, we were both worried about whether or not we could do F6 back in Munsang and we fooled around saying that we might end up in New Method College on Prince Edward Road.

In F6 I gave up all science subjects in lieu of English Literature and History. It was difficult at first to convince the teacher responsible for student affairs to let me take English Literature because I had not taken the subject at the certificate level. The said teacher was teaching Biology and his name was Mr Ko. One day Carmen broke her glasses and she asked me to sit in with her in the biology lesson to take notes. The teacher was mocking me and said I was a phantom making my appearance. In 1979 I again helped Carmen in her teaching job. She had a sore throat and I substituted her lessons for one day. That one-day teaching experience set the scene for my teaching career when I came back to Hong Kong in late 1980.

Carmen would be the first to fly off to the States after F6. Her parents invited her classmates to a farewell feast in a Chinese restaurant. Presents and goodbyes were given and said. She was to spend her three years in Whitewater, Wisconsin. I believe she was the first one to graduate in 1975. She came to visit me once in Ottawa but I don’t remember if she had already departed the US and was living in Hong Kong or not. I took her to a gay party and she left her bag with money in it. Several hundred dollars were stolen. Carmen just shrugged her shoulders leaving the host in guilt.

She wanted to stay in the States but she could not, at least not until her application went through in 1986. Carmen learnt hair dressing in the then prestigious hair dressing school Rever. It was a tough profession to get into. Speed was the key word and Carmen claimed she did not cut hair fast enough. She was a teacher in a private secondary school. Later when she found out her chances to immigrate to Canada was nil if she remained a teacher, she left teaching to work at a friend’s business in Aberdeen as a clerk.

In 1986, her application to immigrate to Canada came through. Her parents were in Toronto and they applied for her to be with them. But upon landing in Toronto she learnt of her success in the US immigration application. She chose to go to the States instead. From Louisiana she began her long and arduous academic career with first a master degree followed by a PhD and another master in IT. It was with joy when I heard she landed a job with the Federal Drug Agency as Site Inspector. She finally landed in a position that allows her to work indoors instead of having to drive here and there. She bought herself a nice place in Maryland. The reason I know so much of her history is of course phone calls from time to time on my side. I must say those phone calls are now rare because she is settled, making a good living and there is no need for me to worry over her lack of support.

Seeing her in the pictures taken recently with her old classmates, I find solace in knowing she is happy, healthy and fulfilled after all those years of uncertainty. I admire her convictions and perseverance but think she could have put more efforts in maintaining her friendships. I was most disappointed when I heard she was in Hong Kong last November but did not try to contact me.

After seeing most of my old friends in Vancouver and warmly received by them, I can now affirm the feeling of joy in meeting someone from our paths in the past is far more than any success we might have had in life.

Advertisement